What Happens at the Club
by Bespectacled BriarRose
Summary: The boys are kicked out of the tower for the night and end up heading to a high-end gentleman's club. Also, Darcy works Fridays. Starcy, Thane, implied Pepperony, Clintasa and BrucexMaria if you squint. Rating may change.
1. Chapter 1

**Steve**

Steve sat on the couch, nose buried in Darcy's dog-eared copy of _Divergent_. He was so engrossed in the book that he didn't notice when everyone gathered around the couch where he was curled up.

"Hey, Capsicle, whatcha reading?" Tony plucked the book from his hands and arched an eyebrow. "_Divergent_? You're reading teen fiction? Really?"

"Shut up, Stark," said Clint, whacking Tony in the head with a pillow. "I know you've read it. Hell, I've got the whole series in my room. They're fantastic. I'm totally Dauntless." Tony chuckled and high-fived the archer, who was perched on the back of a couch.

"Anyway," cut in Pepper. Steve snatched his book back while she was talking. "You guys are going out."

"I'm fine here. Not really feeling going out," commented Steve, sticking his nose back into dystopian Chicago. The lack of a certain nerdy brunette made his nose not want to leave the book, which carried a residual smell of grapefruit. He knew she wouldn't be there anyway; she worked out of the tower on Fridays.

"Too bad," said Clint, snatching the book away from Steve and marking the page with what looked like a small metal arrow clip. "You've done nothing but read for a week straight."

Steve began to protest, but Natasha cut him off, "The entire _Harry Potter_ series in three days. _The Chronicles of Narnia_ in two. And you've read most of _Divergent_ in an hour. And yes, I know, pop culture, but I don't care. None of us do. You're going out."

"Yeah," agreed Jane, who was leaning against Thor. "It took Darcy longer to read those books, and you _know_ what kind of a reader she is. We're kicking you boys out." She and Natasha pulled Steve off of the couch, and Pepper pulled Clint and Tony to the elevator, while Thor just followed them obediently. The men were all herded into the elevator, and Steve was troubled by the ease with which the women were able to get them to comply. They were superheroes, for God's sake! He opened his mouth to protest, but Pepper preempted him.

"Don't come back until midnight," she said, as Maria Hill approached, dragging Bruce by his ear.

"But I was in the middle of an experiment! C'mon, Maria, lemme go back," he pleaded as she shoved him in the elevator.

"Jarvis, down to the lobby, no stops. Happy is waiting for you boys to drive you. See you later," said Maria as the doors closed, separating them from the guys. Clint and Tony just looked at each other, identical grins spreading across their faces.

"STRIP CLUB!" they both shouted, high-fiving each other. Steve rolled his eyes at Bruce, who was rubbing at his ear and muttering about Maria and her rights to drag him out of the lab, even _if_ his experiment had to sit for twenty-four hours, undisturbed.

"What is a strip club?" asked Thor, his voice echoing in the small space.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Two arguments and one slightly awkward explanation later, the five superheroes found themselves at a large table not far from the curtained-off stage in the corner of the dim club. The high end gentleman's club had let the men in immediately upon seeing Tony flash a grin and hand over a hundred dollars.

"I feel ridiculous," muttered Steve as she shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He was surreptitiously checking out their waitress and the other passing girls, but he didn't want Tony to know that. Their waitress was a curvy redhead, her pale skin standing out against the vibrant purple of her corset and garter belt. Her chest was threatening to spill over the top of her corset, and her hips swayed in the sheer panties that hugged her hips as she walked away. Steve pretended to be interested in his rum and coke, and he watched her out of the corner of his eye. Clint was staring unabashedly at the cleavage of a passing blonde, who, embarrassingly enough, was wearing a Captain America-themed corset, with a star necklace perched in between her breasts. Steve's pants were beginning to become a little uncomfortable.

"Why? This is a gentleman's club," said Tony. "We're gentlemen." He reclined in his seat and winked at a passing waitress. "Plus, everyone knows pin-up night is the best." Steve looked around more fully, and realized that all the girls were decked out like the pin-up girls that had graced the pages of small books hidden in the bags of most every soldier in the forties, himself included. He smirked as he remembered this one particular image of a brunette in an army uniform... damn, he wished he still had that book. His hand began to itch for a pencil as a brunette with amazing curves and a fantastic walk sashayed past. There was something familiar about the way her ass swayed as she walked, but he couldn't quite place it. Bruce, however, was choking on his scotch.

"Are you okay, Doctor Banner?" asked Thor, who had modulated his voice to be softer due to the darkened environment. Bruce nodded, and Thor patted him on the back before resuming his intense inspection of the table.

"Thor, you can look you know," commented Clint. "That's why we're here."

"But Jane-" he began.

"Shhh," said Tony, a grin on his face. "You're allowed to look. Don't touch. But look. Jane will survive it. She's been known to check out Spangles' ass from time to time, as well as the Hawk's biceps, and Brucey's brains seem to make her melt." Thor looked up at each man in turn. They all held up their hands to show that they had no interest in taking Jane from him. Thor, reassured, took a tentative look around the room and smiled. He took a sip of his beer, and grinned as a pretty blonde wiggled her fingers at him and winked.

"I think this will be fun," he said. Steve just nodded and leaned back in his chair to admire the view.

_A/N- Hey lovelies :) Sorry its been so long, but I've been crazy-busy. Anyways, this was supposed to be a one-shot, but I wanted to get something up. It'll probably be two chapters, and I should have the next one up maybe Friday or Saturday. Yeah, so, enjoy. I own nothing. Except for the sexy pinup women, but, since they are unnamed, I don't think it matters that much whether or not I do. :P Please R&R, lovelies! Love, Rose_


	2. Chapter 2

**Steve**

The guys joked and drank for a couple of hours, and though Steve couldn't reach that stage of drunkenness that most people strove for, he was feeling a warm buzz in his chest, though that may have just been from laughing too much. Tony was in the middle of a ridiculous story about the time that he and Happy had gotten into a high-speed chase with the paparazzi through the streets of Chicago when the lights dimmed even further.

"Oh, hey, the show's starting," commented Clint, taking another swig of beer and leaning back in his chair. He focused his razor-sharp gaze on the stage, and a spotlight clicked on. A gloved hand pushed through the curtain, and the hand was attached to a willowy blonde. She was followed by another blonde, and two redheads. All four girls were gorgeous, and Steve was quite enjoying the way their skimpy, olive-colored shirts and skirts hugged their curves. Music began to play, and a brunette with a fake army hat pulled low over her eyes strutted out onto the stage and up to the microphone. Bruce began to choke on his scotch again as Clint did a double take. Steve couldn't shake the itch of familiarity, or the way his body was screaming to him that he knew what it felt like for those curves to be pressed to his chest.

"There is no fucking way," muttered Bruce. "No way at all."

Her head snapped up, and Tony spit out his scotch as Clint's jaw hit the floor and Steve choked on his own tongue. Darcy winked at the crowd and began to sing. Her long dark curls spilt out from under the hat onto an expanse of pale skin. She wore a pair of sinfully short olive shorts, and she had a lacy, olive corset that was decorated to resemble a very skimpy army uniform. Actually, it looked like the uniform he himself had worn in the forties. Her hands traced over her satin- and lace-covered curves, and Steve's mouth began to water at the sight. She was singing some song about soldiers, but he couldn't even focus on the words that spilled from her sinful red lips. She kicked up a heel, her black shoes giving her calves and ass a nice bit of extra 'oomph.' Her legs were encased in black stockings with a seam up the back, and her eyes looked huge and seductive.

Clint's eyes were glued to that seam, and he commented, "Well now we know where she goes every weekend." Steve just nodded and shifted uncomfortably in his seat; his pants were quickly becoming far too tight.

"I do recall Lady Darcy mentioning one time that she danced," commented Thor, oblivious to the other men's reactions to Darcy's well-displayed body. Which was probably a good thing, thought Steve, not wanting to get punched in the face for oogling the person Thor saw as a little sister. Darcy danced around in a circle, shaking her ass. Steve's mouth went dry, and he bit his tongue to keep from moaning her name.

She made eye contact with him, and he couldn't tear his eyes away from her slightly surprised dark blue eyes. A wicked smile crept onto her Iron Man-red lips. She strutted toward the edge of the stage and took the proffered hand of a stranger. He helped her down, and she made her way towards their table, still singing into the microphone taped to her cheek. The other girls stayed up onstage, dancing and singing backup vocals.

Darcy leaned her elbow on Bruce's shoulder and continued to sing.

"He's gonna be mad, the way his buddies look atme, " she crooned, shooting Clint a wink. He returned it, eyes raking over her curves. Steve felt a growl go through his chest. Darcy plopped a kiss on Thor's cheek, leaving a mark as red as the cape he usually wore. She ran black-painted fingers over Tony's chest, raked her other hand through Clint's hair, and then plopped herself onto Steve's lap. "But I don't care!" she belted, rolling her hips against his, "'cause my soldier's comin' home!" She got up, grabbed his collar, and pulled him to his feet. Her heels brought her much closer to his height, and she was close enough for him to kiss her. He swallowed as the music faded and she winked. "Welcome home, soldier."

Darcy released his shirt and sat him back down in his chair, wiggled her fingers at the other boys, and swayed back to the stage, where she and the other girls took their bows. Steve was enchanted by the way her ass wiggled as she walked and the way her breasts almost fell out of their tight, olive confines.

"Well. That was… something," said Bruce, trying to breathe normally again.

"Yeah," exhaled Tony. Steve adjusted his pants under the table, trying to relieve some of the pent-up pressure. Clint was sitting with his head leaned back in the chair, trying to compose himself.

"Hey guys," said Darcy, sliding into the empty chair she had dragged over with her. She pulled herself up to the table, stole Steve's beer, and asked, "Enjoy the show?" The guys could only nod, except Thor, who hadn't been affected much at all.

"Your singing was quite beautiful, Lady Darcy," he boomed, a smile crinkling his eyes. Darcy smiled back at him. Steve shifted in his seat, noticing that Darcy was quite close to him. She was clad in a slouchy t-shirt and a different pair of tiny shorts. One of her Converse-clad feet was perched on the chair next to Steve's leg.

"Thanks Thor," she grinned. "Let's get you boys home. Pepper's orders." They all just nodded, and Tony went up to the bar to pay for their drinks. The group climbed into the limo a few minutes later, and Happy drove them home. The ride was mostly silent, and Steve had to keep his eyes on his hands and think of Colonel Phillips in the shower. Darcy was sitting very close to him, and it took all of his self control to not kiss her senseless. The other men were all trying to calm themselves down; seeing their ray of sunshine up onstage like that had done strange things to them, too. Thor just sat there texting Jane, no doubt telling her all about Darcy's dance and their reactions. Steve groaned and buried his face in his hands. Darcy looked at him funny.

"Thor is texting Jane. Natasha will know. We will never live this down," elaborated Steve, causing all the other men to have similar reactions. Bruce buried his face in his hands, Clint slammed his head back against the window, and Tony slipped down onto the floor.

When they arrived back at the tower, they all went their separate ways, except Steve and Darcy, who made their way to the kitchen. "Hungry?" he asked, pulling out bread, cheese, and bacon.

"Sure. Dancing and singing like that gets my appetite up. What's on the menu?" She perched herself on the counter not far from him and swung her legs back and forth, which was terribly distracting. All that bare skin, and those voluptuous curves. She was close enough that he could reach out and run a hand over her knee, up her thigh, around to her hip… He shook his head.

"Grilled cheese with bacon. Sound good?" She nodded eagerly, and he got to work. She babbled on about her weekend job, how Nat had helped her pass her audition. She poured them glasses of lemonade to drink with the sandwiches as Steve pulled plates down from the cabinet above her head. He actually ended up rather close to her, his chest millimeters from hers. He breathed in the smell of her hair and felt her breath stop. A small smile wormed its way onto his face as he went back to flip the sandwiches.

"It's mostly for fun. I like to sing and I like to dance, but no label will sign me because SHIELD. Also, I'm kinda fat for LA," she joked. Steve frowned as he served up the two sandwiches, cut into four neat triangles. "Looks delish!" gushed Darcy as she dug in. She moaned as she took the first bite. "It's like sex in food form. Why don't I ask you to cook for me more often?"

Steve straightened proudly, but then thought back to her comment about being fat. "You're not fat, Darce."

"LA thinks I am. I like food too much to go to LA anyways. Also, living with the Avengers kind of rocks," she said as she devoured half of the sandwich. "Where did you learn to make such a perfect grilled cheese?"

"Food Network. And who gives a shit what LA thinks? Every man in that room tonight wanted you," he said, finishing his own sandwich and taking a drink of his lemonade. She looked at him, thin brown eyebrow raised. He flushed, realizing what he had just said. "I-I mean to say, you-well, you looked gorgeous up there, and what man wouldn't want a pretty dame like you? I- well, what I mean to say is that you're really awfully good at singing and dancing and you were just wonderful and your outfit mighta been little and some eyes may have wandered but your voice was what really-"

Steve was cut off by Darcy's finger on his lips. "You think I'm pretty?" He nodded, unable to speak. "And you wanted me when you saw me up onstage?" He blushed and nodded again. "Did other men looking at me make you jealous?" Steve was unable to answer. Darcy grinned and removed her finger from his lips, only to replace it with her lips. Steve found himself returning the kiss, hands on her hips, bending her back into the counter. She gasped as he bit her lower lip, and her hands fisted in his hair. They came up for air, and Steve continued to kiss and bite at her neck. "Finally," gasped Darcy, arching into his mouth as he got to her breasts. Steve just smiled and kept going.

_A/n- Sorry this took so long! I really meant to get it put up, but the musical happened and stuff... But here it is! I know it's really long, but I just needed to finish it. I have a few more fics in the works; don't worry! Thank you so much to everyone who's read this fic and put up with my lateness. I love you all! _

_-Rose_


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